I was reviewing a piece and its critique notes the other night and one critic said that they didn't like puzzle stories. I am going to interpret that as "Jar of Tang" stories, where the author withholds information so they can have a revelation at the end. I am also going to re-interpret that as stories where the reader gets to the end and says, "Huh?" as opposed to stories that start out a little confusing at first, but by the end the reader says, "Of course."
Looking at what I had written, the effect that I'm working toward -- partially through my choice of first-person narrator's voice -- is to see old things through a new filter in order to induce a sense of wonder. I'll have to keep the balance between a Tang Story and a Wonder-Filter story in mind when I'm working on this piece. I'll have to remember to try to step out of my head and make sure what I'm writing is clear to a reasonable reader. (Yes, it's probably true that I am not a reasonable person.) I edited out some of the more unnecessary decoration from some sentences in an effort to simplify them.
Another critique note was that the language in the piece was ponderous. ... Hmmm... slow or clumsy because of great weight. This one is harder for me to address, because I wanted the piece to have an elevated vocabulary. Again, part of the solution is to simplify. The other part is to look where there are exposition lumps and turn them into in-scene action.
Ah well, back to the editing board.
Showing posts with label critique. Show all posts
Showing posts with label critique. Show all posts
Monday, June 03, 2019
Tuesday, November 17, 2015
Why Fairy Stories
Working out: Saturday I had a full session at the gym. 200 cal on the elliptical, 50 on the rowing machine. 3X12 at 14 on the assisted dips and chin-ups. I tried to do an unassisted chin-up and I can almost-but-not-quite do one. 3X12X40 lbs on the pec fly. 3X12X80 lat pull-downs. 3X12 curl-ups. 3X12X35lbs barbell curls. I think the elliptical session turned on endorphins, because this was a fairly hilarious workout.
Writing: The other night at a critique session, someone asked me why I had written a piece as a fairy tale, or, more precisely, what function telling the story as a fairy tale was bringing to the story. I'm still sort of trying to wrap my head around their question, because it feels like they asked "Why do you speak in English?" and I'm sure that's not what they were trying to get at.
I started to say that I wanted to tell a transformative story in the way that Tolkien talks about in his essay "On Fairy Stories." When I first started writing the story, I'd read "Fairy Tale Queens: Representations of Early Modern Queenship" by Jo Eldridge Carney, a book comparing fairy tale queens with Queen Elizabeth I, and which explored the queen as forge of dynasties, the queen's fertility, and the role of the court and of gardens vis the queen's fertility. That and Tolkien's essay about prohibitions and taboos, made me want to try my hand at writing something like George McDonald's "The Golden Key," or William Morris' "The Story of the Glittering Plain," or Oscar Wilde's "The Selfish Giant." Only with a steampunk style (it wasn't steam-powered so much as wind-up plus some magic).
The mix of vaguely English 18th Century fairy tale with techno-wind-up tech threw some people for a loop. I think the difficulties were with the prohibition, which is part of the fairy tale formula, and the unbelievable way the princess had broken it; and courtly dialog.
I took the question a little further, and I wondered, why is it that I write urban fantasy, or science fiction, instead of mainstream literary fiction, or magical realism, or memoir. And I guess the answer is, "I write what I'd like to read more of."
I'll confess I went in thinking "this manuscript is going to blow everyone away" because it had done more-or-less that with The Wordos. The coolest thing about writing is when and idea in my head manages to jump into another person's head, but it became clear that that hadn't happened with this particular reader and this particular fairy tale manuscript.
When my writing doesn't work, there are times that I feel like it's because I'm defective, or an unactuated adult, or the wrong person at the wrong place at the wrong time. We used to have someone at the Wordos who wrote cool, lyrical poetry--but who couldn't write a linear plot to save his life and his stories were labyrinthine tomes that were frustrating to critique; I don't want to be that person.
Had a stuck in Arcosanti dream. I had to walk out of Arcosanti--which had a suburban development around it--to the junction, which was on a curving mountain-side (think Mary's Peak) and wait for either a bus or Mark to pick me up.
Working out: Monday I managed to get to the gym. 190 cal on the elliptical in 20 minutes, 100 on the rowing machine in 10. 3X12 at 14 on the assisted dips and 3X10 on chin-ups. 3X12X40 lbs on the pec fly. 3X12X80 lat pull-downs. 3X12 curl-ups.
Writing: The other night at a critique session, someone asked me why I had written a piece as a fairy tale, or, more precisely, what function telling the story as a fairy tale was bringing to the story. I'm still sort of trying to wrap my head around their question, because it feels like they asked "Why do you speak in English?" and I'm sure that's not what they were trying to get at.
I started to say that I wanted to tell a transformative story in the way that Tolkien talks about in his essay "On Fairy Stories." When I first started writing the story, I'd read "Fairy Tale Queens: Representations of Early Modern Queenship" by Jo Eldridge Carney, a book comparing fairy tale queens with Queen Elizabeth I, and which explored the queen as forge of dynasties, the queen's fertility, and the role of the court and of gardens vis the queen's fertility. That and Tolkien's essay about prohibitions and taboos, made me want to try my hand at writing something like George McDonald's "The Golden Key," or William Morris' "The Story of the Glittering Plain," or Oscar Wilde's "The Selfish Giant." Only with a steampunk style (it wasn't steam-powered so much as wind-up plus some magic).
The mix of vaguely English 18th Century fairy tale with techno-wind-up tech threw some people for a loop. I think the difficulties were with the prohibition, which is part of the fairy tale formula, and the unbelievable way the princess had broken it; and courtly dialog.
I took the question a little further, and I wondered, why is it that I write urban fantasy, or science fiction, instead of mainstream literary fiction, or magical realism, or memoir. And I guess the answer is, "I write what I'd like to read more of."
I'll confess I went in thinking "this manuscript is going to blow everyone away" because it had done more-or-less that with The Wordos. The coolest thing about writing is when and idea in my head manages to jump into another person's head, but it became clear that that hadn't happened with this particular reader and this particular fairy tale manuscript.
When my writing doesn't work, there are times that I feel like it's because I'm defective, or an unactuated adult, or the wrong person at the wrong place at the wrong time. We used to have someone at the Wordos who wrote cool, lyrical poetry--but who couldn't write a linear plot to save his life and his stories were labyrinthine tomes that were frustrating to critique; I don't want to be that person.
Had a stuck in Arcosanti dream. I had to walk out of Arcosanti--which had a suburban development around it--to the junction, which was on a curving mountain-side (think Mary's Peak) and wait for either a bus or Mark to pick me up.
Working out: Monday I managed to get to the gym. 190 cal on the elliptical in 20 minutes, 100 on the rowing machine in 10. 3X12 at 14 on the assisted dips and 3X10 on chin-ups. 3X12X40 lbs on the pec fly. 3X12X80 lat pull-downs. 3X12 curl-ups.
Sunday, April 14, 2013
Writer Thou Shalt Nots
One of the conversations that came up during the Clarion Day Workshop was how critique groups sometimes become rule-based, and they start to develop lists of Things A Writer Shouldn't Do. A writer shouldn't use flashbacks because it slows the plot and confuses the reader. A writer shouldn't start a story with dialogue.
This is incomplete advice which leads to auto-pilot critique and writing. The complete advice is There Are Things A Writer Shouldn't Do Poorly. For example, poor flashback use will confuse a reader, but skillful use of it will make a story work.
The take-away reminder is that a skillful writer can break the rules.
Another gem of advice that I was reminded about was how good writing is like walking on a narrow plank. My personal plank is the details plank: fall off it one way, and the story is buried what I call Tolkien Sclerosis; fall off the other way and the reader can't see the scene on the page or gets confused because the writer has assumed knowledge on the reader's part. One other dichotomy was when to use internal exposition verses character dialog to bring a reader up to speed about the story's situation. Go too far one way, and the characters are having flashbacks in the middle of sword fights; go to far the other way and the characters are having "as you know, Bob" dialog.
This is incomplete advice which leads to auto-pilot critique and writing. The complete advice is There Are Things A Writer Shouldn't Do Poorly. For example, poor flashback use will confuse a reader, but skillful use of it will make a story work.
The take-away reminder is that a skillful writer can break the rules.
Another gem of advice that I was reminded about was how good writing is like walking on a narrow plank. My personal plank is the details plank: fall off it one way, and the story is buried what I call Tolkien Sclerosis; fall off the other way and the reader can't see the scene on the page or gets confused because the writer has assumed knowledge on the reader's part. One other dichotomy was when to use internal exposition verses character dialog to bring a reader up to speed about the story's situation. Go too far one way, and the characters are having flashbacks in the middle of sword fights; go to far the other way and the characters are having "as you know, Bob" dialog.
Thursday, February 28, 2013
Writing and Dracula
It was a dark and stormy night.
I came across a children's science book that was badly edited. I'm not sure what was up with that. The tone was conversational, and I think that must have turned off the editor's editing abilities. I'm still shocked that they mixed up the word "subsumed" and "sublimated" to describe what dry ice does.
In different news, I have a manuscript pending with the Wordos. It's an idea and milieu story, so it feels a little slow to me. Or maybe it feels like a game campaign log. I like the setting, and I like my main character, but I'm not sure if I've made them shine enough to make the story work. I expect the manuscript will be torn to shreds, so that should make it easier to spot the weak spots.
I'm currently working on a manuscript that I'd run out of steam with. At the time of abandonment, I thought it was a horrible mess, but going back to it, it is not as confused and horrific as I thought it was. It's a vampire story in the same vein (heh) as Stoker; no sparkly vampires here. What had made me put it down for a while was making the vampire character seem real. The trick is to keep the Stoker aspects clear but not worn out. The challenge for me is to understand how Dracula's existence would have been a horrific inversion of the Christian Eucharist to Stoker's victorian readers, and translate that into something a modern reader can identify with while still keeping a fantasy victorian feel.
Maybe I can make my Dracula a poor editor of children's science books.
I came across a children's science book that was badly edited. I'm not sure what was up with that. The tone was conversational, and I think that must have turned off the editor's editing abilities. I'm still shocked that they mixed up the word "subsumed" and "sublimated" to describe what dry ice does.
In different news, I have a manuscript pending with the Wordos. It's an idea and milieu story, so it feels a little slow to me. Or maybe it feels like a game campaign log. I like the setting, and I like my main character, but I'm not sure if I've made them shine enough to make the story work. I expect the manuscript will be torn to shreds, so that should make it easier to spot the weak spots.
I'm currently working on a manuscript that I'd run out of steam with. At the time of abandonment, I thought it was a horrible mess, but going back to it, it is not as confused and horrific as I thought it was. It's a vampire story in the same vein (heh) as Stoker; no sparkly vampires here. What had made me put it down for a while was making the vampire character seem real. The trick is to keep the Stoker aspects clear but not worn out. The challenge for me is to understand how Dracula's existence would have been a horrific inversion of the Christian Eucharist to Stoker's victorian readers, and translate that into something a modern reader can identify with while still keeping a fantasy victorian feel.
Maybe I can make my Dracula a poor editor of children's science books.
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
Writing Progress
Last night one of my manuscripts got critiqued. Most everyone liked the imagery and language, and everyone wanted to see more of the protagonist's emotional decisions. There were a couple of folks who got thrown out by Christian references--it's a fantasy setting with an alternate-universe religion that's sort of like Christianity, and it looks like I have to give a few more details about the world so folks can see how it is different from ours.
In some ways, last night's manuscript was a quintessential John manuscript: cool eye candy, immersive world building, characters doing things for obscure reasons. The story mostly works, because the character is a little numb to begin with... but I'll need to add some more interior thoughts and emotions to flesh the protagonist out. Numb characters seem to be another John-trope.
I'd hoped to get to sleep right after Wordos... and of course I had to run a quick errand that kept me up later.
This morning was sort of productive. I should have given myself permission to sleep in. After about fourty minutes of annotating a draft copy of Tuesday night's manuscript, the family woke up and needed the kitchen table. I was still pretty tired, and my feet felt achy, so I crept back into bed. Umm... Manuscript: 2, John:1.
In some ways, last night's manuscript was a quintessential John manuscript: cool eye candy, immersive world building, characters doing things for obscure reasons. The story mostly works, because the character is a little numb to begin with... but I'll need to add some more interior thoughts and emotions to flesh the protagonist out. Numb characters seem to be another John-trope.
I'd hoped to get to sleep right after Wordos... and of course I had to run a quick errand that kept me up later.
This morning was sort of productive. I should have given myself permission to sleep in. After about fourty minutes of annotating a draft copy of Tuesday night's manuscript, the family woke up and needed the kitchen table. I was still pretty tired, and my feet felt achy, so I crept back into bed. Umm... Manuscript: 2, John:1.
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