Mad Writing Schemes

Alternatives to the Writing Residency I didn't get into, which would have hosted me for twelve days with a room in a compound with other writers, sculptors, dancers, architects, and other artists.

SCHEME	COST
Write on a Train!	About $45 for a round trip to Portland and back on the Amtrak Cascades, about $90 to Seattle and back, and about $700 to New York City and back (although I'd want to spend $1500 for a sleeper room)... at which point I'd just take a plane. Also, with depressing frequency, the train often turns into a (nice) bus.
Steampunk Balloon Writing: attach weather balloons (and gears!) to a lawn chair, grab a cell phone, a GPS, and a laptop -- oh, and a parachute! -- and write. I could make it a social media extravaganza as I write a short story at 3,000 or 4,000 feet, um, heading east? I think this was a MacGyver plot...	The biggest cost would be the $500 fine (at least) from the FAA for flying an aircraft without a license.
Escape to the coast and write at Sylvia Beach Hotel.  Maybe I'll stay in one of the rooms that has a ghost.	I'd have to book the Tolkien Room, at $120 a night. Also, there's always that tsunami worry in the back of my head.
Go urban in the east side of Portland and write at McMenamin's White Eagle	About $70 a night. Mark and I stayed here once; the rooms are fairly small and it's more a place to crash than to write. Plus trying to sleep over the Rock-n-Roll saloon downstairs.  Luckily, it's in the "fairless square" so the PDX MAX line is accessable.
Write in the spiffy McMenamin's Edgefield	About $50 a night -- which is oddly affordable -- but there's a catch; this place is really popular with weddings, so good luck trying to book a room for longer than four days (or on a weekend).  Cue 20-something wedding guests proclaiming "I am so drunk!"
A friend told me about this Cute Place on the other side of Willamette Pass.	About $100 a night. This place looks really cute and it looks like it is suited more for groups than individuals. Looks popular with skiers and motorcycle clubs.
Write and stay at Odell Lake Lodge	I stayed in the lodge once over ten years ago, and I hope they've improved the matresses.  I think I'd try to book one of the cabins, like "Newberry Crater", for $110 a night. It looks like there are other larger options that would work for a group write-in.
Become inspired by the waters at Belknap Hot Springs	If I had a little RV or van, I could stay there for $35 a night; otherwise, it's about $130 a night.  I love the garden there, and it would be the perfect place for early morning inspirational walks. Hmm, they might have weddings here.
Crater Lake Lodge	$180 / night. It could be an interesting place to write, but my sense was that the public spaces were dark and noisy.  It might be cheaper to rent a nearby "camping motel" and slum it at the lodge.
OSU Fishtrap Facility	$650 a week for a one-room yurt.
Fall Mountain Lookout Cabin	It's Not-Camping in an old fire lookout tower!  "I love not camping!"   I'm not sure what the cost is, but I think the place is booked for the next year.  PS: It's camping.
Escape to Room 6 (the only room with a desk) at the Jennings' Hotel	@125 per night to stay in Joseph Oregon. There is a residency program.... and the cost is you contribute what you write to their collection.
Stay in the Fireside Motel in Yachats	$660 a week in one of the "Western Gull" rooms. Probably nicer than the less expensive Dublin House. As an added perk, probably within walking distance to a coffee/hot cocoa shack (which I have written in before).  And there's that tsunami thing again....
Find a lovely hideaway cabin on Mt. Hood	Cost unknown, I need to speak with someone who knows its secret.
Find someone with a boat I can rent and live on and write for a week	First I have to find someone with a boat they'll rent me....
Figure out how to get into the Spring Creek Project...	Hmmm... the cost of this is that you have to collaborate with a stranger.
Figure out a way to camp out in the Crumpacker Family Library...	I would love to pilgrimage to the CFL and write in the converted Masonic Temple, surrounded by books. Having sat on the four thrones there, I can tell you they're comfortable. Alas and alack, I'm not finding any writers' residencies with them, and they probably take a dim view of folks sleeping on the reading desks.
Run away to a Mountain Chateau at the Oregon Caves! (Just think of it, Petra!)	It's possible to get a single room for about $110 a night.  Books quickly.  On the plus side, the Oregon Caves are about 100 feet away, and also the chateau is supposedly haunted!
Just stay home...	Cue Dorothy Gale: "If I ever go looking for my heart's desire again, I won't look any further than my own back yard. Because if it isn't there, I never really lost it to begin with."

Thinks... saving my money for a Macbook is looking more attractive.